The Atheist Delusion

“Imagine no more ignorant and misleading posters”

Oh boy! The world would be such a wonderful place if religion didn’t exist! Everyone would be kind to one another regardless of their differences and any sort of conflict would be non-existent! The world would be like an episode from The Brady Bunch (minus Jan Brady). Is it really that simple?

Being once labeled a militant atheist myself, I applaud propaganda that portrays religion in a negative light. This poster, however, only portrays the ignorance perpetuated by irate atheists. Whenever there is a huge catastrophe, like that of 9/11, people’s first instinct is to blame something or someone. This instinct is partially the reason why conspiracy theories tend to linger on the Internet for longer than a day. It’s attractive to fill in the logical void that so many people have, more often than not, that void is filled with nonsense.

Here we have atheists spewing out the same atrocity their religious rivals have committed. Religious people need an explanation to the unknown universe. They fill in this gap with some organized religion that offers an “undisputable” explanation to all of the universe’s mysteries. Atheists, supposedly, do not tolerate such explanations that cannot be disputed without a logical critique. Hypocritically enough, this poster blindly connects religion as the sole cause for terrorism, like that of which was witnessed on September eleventh.

Clearly, religion played a part in building the terrorists’ ideologies that inevitably led to their irrational behaviors. But religion isn’t the only institution that leads to ideologies! Even if you discard faith and replace it with logic, you can still end up with conflicting ideologies.

Atheists might argue that only religion can create people who blindly accept their ideologies with strong convictions. Humans will always have a belief system with no scientific justification. In a meaningless world, humans must create themselves a purpose in order to be happy and purpose leads to ideologies. Religion isn’t the only institution that gives people purpose; there are plenty of substitutes. If religion didn’t exist, people would still have clashing ideologies.

If religion did not exist, terrorism would still persist.

A Girl's Worst Insult

Every group of people has an insult that would offend them the most.

Gamer: Noob
Atheist: Secular fundamentalist
Conservative Republican: Flaming homosexual
Mensa Member: Emotionally retarded
Redditor: Below average
Professional Athlete: Drugee
American College Girl: Slut

The insult I would like to focus on is ‘slut’, also known as, whore and skank. The outdated definition for slut: a dirty, nasty promiscuous woman that no one would even touch. This conventional definition is a bit extreme. In my opinion, slutiness can only be illustrated as a continuous spectrum drawn between ‘mildly provocative’ and ‘nickel and dime whore’.

Even more obscure than the definition is the amount of slutaphobia exhibited in today’s college girls. “Does this make me look slutty?” is the new “Does this make me look fat?” A girl’s self worth depends on the modesty she displays to the world. The more she conceals, the higher she believes others will value her. Looking at how college girls present themselves today might have you think otherwise. Even average girls have no remorse in exposing their (damaged) goods.

Hate these redundant photos? Read this

I would post more pictures for evidence, but Googling “Slutty College Girls,” is easy enough.

How can girls demonize promiscuity and still look like strippers with a 20% discount? To answer this, you have to understand that slutiness is all about context. If the standard of sluttiness were lowered enough, the average girl would look like those in the picture above.

If those naughty nurses were to show up like that for their family reunion, you can imagine how many perverted uncles and cousins would hit on them. But seriously, they would just be considered slutty by the rest of the family.

If you or someone you know is concerned about looking like a skank, just take a sample population from the context, rank their average sluttiness, and stay within one standard deviation of that average!

Cuteness Blue Balls

Source

Your face scrunches up like you’re having an orgasm with your eyes open as you let out a thunderous ‘aaaaaaaaawwwwwww’. You gaze at the cute figure for another ten seconds fantasizing how much you want to squeeze and cuddle it until the cuteness runs out. But then what? You’re left with what I call “Cuteness Blue Balls.” There is absolutely nothing you can do about your cuteness frustrations, but to wallow in your own sadness. No button you can press, no body part you can stroke that can alleviate you from this pain.

Psychologist, Konrad Lorenz, theorized that cuteness is an evolutionary adaptation to ensure that adults cared for their children, which makes sense. We associate cuteness with weakness and helplessness. This could explain why we respond similarly when seeing non-cute figures in vulnerable situations. Because we are constantly burdened by a child’s cuteness, we have a strong desire to nurture and take care of it. Of course, a small minority prefer their baby dead and then grotesquely joke about it, but there will always be exceptions.

Lorenz’s theory falls short of explaining why animals emulate the same cuteness qualities humans have e.g. big eyes, big head, small body, and other soft features. He argues, however, that humans selectively breed their pets to have child-like features, which would explain the cuteness in domesticated animals. But cuteness stretches beyond cats and dogs – bears, bugs, ducks, owls, lizards, turtles, and many more non-domesticated animals all display cuteness.

How can so many animals be so gosh darn cute? In my opinion, ‘Cuteness Blue Balls’ is not limited to humans, but to all mammals. This hypothesis is easy to accept because mammals have to nurture their offspring comparable to humans and their children. This still leaves us questioning why mammals share cuteness qualities with humans. Being that we all share a common ancestor, it wouldn’t be far-fetched to assume that animals perceive cuteness in the same ways humans do – an interesting hypothesis to test.

Cuteness is like the unifying theory of interspecies emotional connection, which could explain the interspecies bonanza going on here

The Major Stereotpye

What’s your major?

At my university, every person I meet asks me this question. I often wonder why people care to ask which subject of emphasis I chose to study. How much information could they possibly extract from my answer? Thinking about this further has led me to a realization that might come as surprise to you. The amount of personal information that leaks from your answer is quite frightening.

Allow me to bring a new term to the discussion: “The Major Stereotype”

Like any other stereotype, this one generalizes a group of people in an arbitrary taxonomy. Someone’s major can reveal his or her hobbies, social status, mannerisms, intelligence, virginity status and much more. Of course, these are just generalizations that should be taken with a grain of salt, but what makes them different than other stereotypes? For example, unlike ethnic stereotypes, people choose their major not their ethnicity. This ‘major’ difference sheds some light onto the reason why people choose their majors.

People take into account ‘The Major Stereotype’ in the decision process for their major. After all, picking a major is also picking an identity, the identity that people will assert onto you when answering the question: “What’s your major?” With knowledge of the new stereotype that may loom in your future, you choose the major with the most lucrative stereotype. Similar to how people buy Ferraris because they want to look wealthy. Once the major has been chosen, a new personality is born.

What came first, the major or the personality? Simply put, they affect each other in sort of a feedback loop. Some people choose a major because they want to fit a certain category and some choose it because they like the subject. Playing ‘the major stereotype’ usually occurs in the former situation. In a society that values the ego, it wouldn’t be far-fetched to assume that people choose a major they want to be associated with.

P.S. those who are undeclared have no soul.

The True Cost of War

At any given time throughout history, a war is going on somewhere on this planet. Supposedly, humans are kind, compassionate, and sympathetic, unlike the primitive creatures they evolved from. Human's constant state of war is casting doubt on their ancestral divergence. I have always wondered how such heartless thoughts can be conjured up in the minds of murderous soldiers. How intelligent beings can be so unhesitant to mercilessly kill their fellow man. How sane people can achieve insane tasks.

There have been studies regarding this phenomenon, like the Milgram experiment: A subject who has neither ability nor expertise to make decisions, especially in a crisis, will leave decision making to the group and its hierarchy. Another interpretation of the experiment’s results is that a person no longer sees himself as responsible for his actions. Both are sound theories, but they fall short of identifying what is explicitly happening – the destruction of empathy.

Soldiers of war are not psychopaths; they are victims of robbery, the robbery of a human quality called empathy. There are many social and political consequences that deter us from committing crimes. Unlawful crime and violence still persists in all societies, therefore, there must be other deterring consequences for those who are still innocent i.e. the reason most of us aren’t murders. The reason, simply put, is that people will feel bad doing onto others what they wouldn’t want onto themselves. Manipulative authorities have the ability to rob people of this basic emotion.

Humans have evolved the emotion of empathy for a very good reason. In the past it allowed people within a society to create interpersonal relationships where both sides benefit without making the other worse off. Societies couldn’t succeed for generations on end if humans weren’t empathetic. Clearly, this is no longer the case; birth rates are higher than death rates and a few wars here and there are no threat to mankind. This fact should not obscure the benefits of empathy.

The interpersonal cost of violence is always greater than any benefits it may bring. Using a negative force may initially get you what you want from someone, but in doing so you have destroyed the positive relationship. The cost of destroying this relationship is always greater than the initial benefit received from using violence.

The use of violence as a force has always been a lucrative one because of instant gratification. The Bush administration believed it could use violence to create a democracy. It is intuitive for them to think that killing Saddam and occupying Iraq will be the most efficient way to get what they want. They didn’t consider one major externality - they dehumanized Americans for Iraqis and vice versa. In order for American soldiers to use violence against another fellow human, there is no room for empathy. Without empathy in the equation, mass murdering may relentlessly ensue. Eventually we are left with a torn human relationship.

Let’s scrutinize a more controversial war, the Israel vs. Palestine conflict. Which side is the right one? Who is the victim and who is the aggressor? If you choose Palestine as the victim, you are wrong. Similarly, you would be wrong if you choose Israel as the victim! This war was lost the moment the positive relationship between the two human populations has been broken. Violence and hatred is used on both sides and both are constantly distancing themselves from a positive relationship. The war would be over once Palestinians cared for Israelis like they did for their own people, the same is true for Israelis. Some would argue that a negative force for self-defense is sometimes necessary. In the short-run, this is true and instant gratification would kick in. In the long run, a deep wound would emerge in the relationship and the negative force would be reciprocated back.

With the wars that are going on in present day, it’s difficult to come to a resolution. Should we continue to reach short-term goals with violence, or settle the problem in the long run with non-violence? If non-violence is used, there might be a short-term jump in the death tolls, but that would be the cost of fixing the problem in the long run. A non-violence movement is the only way to bring empathy back and restore a broken human relationship.

Why we aren't all Hung Like a Horse

There you are in front of your mirror looking at your reflection in utter disappointment. Regardless of being a man or woman you realize how un-sexy you are, unfortunately, odds are you’re right. But don’t blame your dad’s big-nose gene, blame society’s ridiculous high standards for sexuality. These standards are no longer a woman’s burden; nowadays a man too must struggle to be a sexual stallion. His penis needs to be at least the size of a super burrito and his abs as hard as limestone. Sadly, this total package won’t suffice - he must also be an orgasm-giving machine. He should be able to make the woman squeal for hours on end as she has orgasms upon orgasms. He knows the women will gossip about his inadequacies if he ‘falls short’ of the standards.

Some might accuse me for spewing out gender stereotypes with no proof to back it up. Well, the proof is so abundant it is self-evident to any member of society. In 2004 the drugs bought most often online were Lipitor and Viagra, one to lower cholesterol and one to help with erectile dysfunction. It is hard to believe that erectile dysfunction is more common than other symptom such as, oh I don't know... pain! You might have not known that premature ejaculation is more common than erectile dysfunction, but you won’t see a premature ejaculation pill as a best seller. That just doesn’t sound as lucrative as a six-hour erection.

Men are so obsessed with their size that they are willing to spend money pretending to have a foot-long. 90% of men measure between 5 to 7 inches; anything beyond or below that is exceptionally rare. Why do they have Magnum XXL condoms when a normal one can cover a grapefruit? Why don’t they offer Pee-wee XXS condoms for the unfortunate bottom tenth percent of men? Next we can examine porn and observe what people prefer to watch. You won’t find a professional male porn star with a penis smaller than 7 inches; anything less won’t satisfy society's penis obsession.

If women really did prefer men with larger beef missiles, shouldn’t we have evolved larger penises throughout time? After all, it would be a physical trait that would determine reproductive success. Unfortunately, we aren’t all hung like horses; therefore there must be something wrong with this hypothesis. It could be that larger size was and is never preferred by women. This would be difficult to prove; some women say they prefer it larger and some are indifferent to size. The answer to this conundrum may be more obvious than you think.

Only in the past century has there been a paradigm shift on what it means to have sex. In the past, sex was never about satisfying the woman and her preferences were not considered. Globally, women were suppose to repress themselves sexually and were used only for reproduction. In the medieval era, the Christian code said that sex was to be avoided like the plague, except for the bare minimum necessary to keep the race in existence. Only recently did the western world evolve its sexual morality and behavior such as changes documented in the sexual revolution.

No wonder the majority of men are sexually inadequate, they just weren’t trying for thousands of years!

5 Tips on How to Be More Creative

Everyone would agree that creativity is an important quality to have in order to succeed in any profession. Not only that, creative individuals can benefit the whole world, as did Albert Einstein and Thomas Edison. There is no doubt that creativity indirectly benefits mankind, but is this popular notion intuitively correct? How could writing poetry or doodling cartoons benefit Albert Einstein in his discovery of the atom bomb? Clearly, it wouldn’t help him in any significant way. There is a certain creative process that needs to be exercised in order to translate meaningless ideas into useful ones.

Here are 5 tips to being more creative in a meaningful way:

1. Make analogies and connections

You need to constantly make analogies and connections with everything. Doing this exercise will not only help you better understand complicated concepts, but also make you more creative! Connecting two concepts together can inspire innovative ideas. For example, letting your friends borrow money is analogous to a human ATM machine. Lets take that a step further - what if it was possible to be an actual human ATM machine. Now imagine if they had wallets that double as an ATM machine. If someone owes you money, they could just swipe your wallet. And with just that analogy I came with a startup idea.

2. Philosophize

Philosophizing is creative thinking with a logical foundation. Use this rigorous foundation to ponder the mysteries in your domain of study. Many scientific theories have been inspired by philosophy. A popular scientific philosophy is String Theory. A sense of wonder wasn’t the only thing that gave rise to String Theory. The logical nature of philosophy guides the mathematicians and scientists in the right direction.

3. Consider the exact opposite

Being critical of everything is an excellent way to jump-start your brain. Have you ever had someone critically scrutinize your opinion and ended up having a stronger stance than what you began with? Seeing both sides of an argument gives you the motivation to think. Take conventional wisdom and try to argue in the complete opposite direction. This simple thought exercise will surprise you as to how much you will learn.

4. Say the obvious

There has been many times where a new invention or new website pops up and we say, “Why didn’t I think of that?” Ironically, the most obvious is also the most looked over. When you have time to ponder, observe your surroundings and literally say the obvious. Let your inner captain obvious shine through and say whatever you observe(you might want to keep it to yourself for social reasons). This exercise won’t make you creative on its on merit; it should be used as a way to spark new ideas, you shouldn’t take a passive role.

5. Always ask why, and then answer it.

Don’t be like the children who always ask why, because they can’t answer on their own. The trick is to let your own mind do the thinking to come at your own conclusion. This will get you accustomed to the different ways of solving problems. Keep trying to answer 'why' until you come up with an answer that is hard to refute. After much practice, you will find yourself answering 'why' faster and faster. Learning all sorts of different methods for solving problems will equip you with the mental tools for creatively solving harder problems in the future.

Girl Jokes That Aren't Funny Anymore

Girl Joke #1: "Haha, You fail at life"

One common format for a punch line is to use a word that is unexpected. How many times have you heard girls say this joke? Twice? Three times? They completely shatter the unpredictable element of the joke. The punch line is so predictable that it’s the same as if it were a normal statement and that’s just depressing.

Girl Joke #2: "Good point! Want a cookie?"

This Joke usually occurs after pointing out the girl’s stupidity in a condensing fashion e.g. after pointing out that she shouldn’t be wearing a mini-skirt in freezing whether. Saying this joke should oblige the girl to literally bake a batch of cookies and give them to funny people.

Girl Joke #3: "Oops! Jay Kay!"

Great, she just said something mind-numbingly dumb and covers it up with an even dumber joke. I bet this joke wasn’t even thought up; it was just a knee-jerk reaction due to the constant usage of the acronym in her online conversations.

Girl Joke #4: "Ah, my bad, no biscuit for me."

Yea, no biscuit for you bitch.

Girl Joke #5: "Sucks to be you"

The only thing separating this sentence from being a rude thing to say is the bitchy tone. The girl is at a lose-lose situation; either way she says this joke, she is bound to be ostracized. This joke has the unique quality of applying itself to the joke teller.

Girl Joke #6: "Awk ward Teeheehee"

There is a comedic pause between the two syllables in the word awkward… genius! Next time a girl says this make sure to say, “you’re fat,” then pause for ten seconds and follow up with “Awk ward.”

Girl Joke #7:"Hahaha, not funny"

This phrase is so ubiquitous amongst girls that it has absolutely no element of surprise. Merely mouthing the phrase, with the appropriate facial expressions, will suffice in delivering the same message.